Friday reflections: How to cope with life and its challenges

10:44


On my journey to work today i was in a contemplating and reflective mood. The happy Friday feeling had most certainly kicked in BUT i still felt a need to reflect. I think it is so important to take a step back every now and again and reflect on life, struggles, achievements and all we have to be thankful for. We get so caught up in our life and the negatives that we actually forget that there is so much around us so be appreciative about. Im guilty of this.

If you have faith, health, family, a roof over your head and food to eat then you are more blessed then you realise. In the last few months i have seen so much for example the i have seen the loss of innocent civilians during war, i have seen people struggling through hardships and come through fighting and i have seen some who are at a crossroad in their life not knowing where to turn. One thing i learnt through all this is, never judge a book by its cover. Some seem outwardly content however we just do not know what is going on inside, what their hearts are agonising over. We think people are fine and happy but little do we know about their struggles. This is why it is so important to embrace whatever you have going on in your life and see the positive in it. Allah may have taken away something from you to protect you, Allah may have blessed you with an awful situation, yes awful, just to bring you closer to him. We think we know what is best for us, but we don't, Allah does, hence why we must always seek guidance and be thankful for whatever obstacles or blessings come in our path.

What i have learnt is life is not easy, but if you let your situation control you then you are already losing and on a downward spiral. You need to take control of what you can and do your very best, once you have done that then you leave it to Allah. The following hadith comes to mind as i type this;

One day the Messenger of Allah (saws) noticed a bedouin (desert Arab) leaving his camel without tying it and he asked the bedouin: "Why don't you tie down your camel?"  The bedouin answered, "I put my trust in Allah." The Prophet (saws) then said, "Tie your camel first, then put your trust in Allah"  (Tirmidhi).

This is one of my favourite Hadith as it quite perfectly states; that we must always do what we possibly can to better a situation and then we leave it to Allah. Whatever is better for us will happen, when you put your trust in Allah know that only good things can come of this. You may not see it in this life, maybe you will see it in the Akhirah (hereafter). Sometimes we become overwhelmed and that causes us to retract and let the problem or issue we have consume us. 

Everyone has a struggle in some shape or form in their lives, if this life was so perfect what would be the point? This life is not meant to be perfect,  Jannah is where you will find perfection. So if you are sad, please do remember that this is not the final destination. Stop trying to create a Utopia here, have patience and work towards Jannah! We are all travellers in this world, stop thinking it is permanent. Whatever struggle you are facing, remember that this is also temporary and this time will pass. Imagine Jannah and how amazing it will be, you will be with who you love and have all you ever wanted and the best thing is- it'll be forever. 

A recent seminar I attended by an amazing sister Yasmin Mogahed really helped me to regain some much needed focus. I had just come back from hajj, and those of you who have been blessed with this once in a lifetime opportunity can probably relate to what i was feeling. I felt i had hit an anti climax, i just just lived a dream, i had been granted one of my greatest wishes and then i was back to the reality of this world. Hardships, tests, life. It was a really difficult adjustment to make especially as i had just started a new job. However this seminar helped me put things back into perspective, i was reminded that this life is temporary and will pass. I needed to work on my akhirah. The one analogy Sister Yasmin Mogahed made which really aided me is; We should treat our life and this world like a hotel room when travelling. Yes a hotel room. When we go on holidays do we stock up on furniture, food, cutlery for our hotel room? No we do not! Why? Because we do not expect to stay there long. We stay at the hotel, not giving it much significance, maybe admiring its beauty but when it is time to leave, we are fine to leave. This is because we have not become attached to this hotel room, we saw it as a temporary place to live and when it's time to go home we happily pack up and go. This is how we must treat this world. We aren't here forever so why get so attached to worldly things when this will all pass. Why not focus on Jannah where you can have whatever you desire and more (things we aren't even capable of imagining). If we have this mindset, we will not become so consumed by our hardships. Take each day as it comes, let go of the past, stop worrying about the future, tie your camel (do all you can) and put your trust in Allah.

Now having said all this, i myself can put my hand up and say this is not easy. We are so easily immersed into the world that we lose focus. But we have to take control and ensure we do not let our woes consume us. This can be done through stepping back every now and again and trying to observe your situation as an outsider. Observe it, make notes, think if it was a friend what would you advise and then act on that. We are often great at advising others but cant take this advice on ourselves. Make an active effort to repair what you can, always remember Allah, focus, pray, pour your heart out to the Almighty and then just let it be. We are not the final deciders of anything, only Allah decides the outcome. Once you have done all you can and have faith be content that the results are for your betterment.

Look around you, I guarantee you there are others struggling. Be thankful for what you have, if you need help seek it from your friends, family and knowledgable people and don't try and struggle through it alone. Be active rather then passive and make the changes you can. 

If things are going great, remember to always thank the Almighty and remain faithful as sometimes a blessing can be your test. 

I'll leave a parting note (a verse from the Quran) for you all to ponder on. This is one of my personal favourites....

“And if you could count the favours of Allah, never would you be able to count them. Truly, Allah is Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful”[16:18]❤️


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